Tuesday, April 12, 2005
i dont know whats wrong with me!!! having mood swing and i'm feeling very down and angry at one moment and the next happy. it so crazy and i dont wish to control it.just leave it the ways it is.
so sorry for if i scream at you or ignore you.
exams are making me so stressful and i've been a good girl. i study the whole day after school without watching television.hahas.and didnt go on com on monday.yupps.when i was resting in school today.images flashes across me. i thought of killing someone using a broken glass. and the someone is from 2/7. i dont know why? but the thought just came to me and i was very happy about it.i told kelly about the images and she ask me who is it??? dont wanna tell anyone about it. and the person was like fuck you,scolding me and i slash a deep wound on her hand and the blood gushes out. it was so crazy,that thought. i dont know why?and i kept repeating the actions over and over again and i was even laughing.arghhh.. what going on???i dont know. i really dont know. sigh. i'm really tired. but if you give me a chance to cut the person i hate most. i will do it without going to jail or whatever.
and i'm really angry.using you and everything and without us.you couldnt survive.ohwells. the feeling of hate is coming again like the time when in sec one . i dont wish to hate you but you keep getting me on it. dont blame me for it. blame it on yourself.this really sucks. i trapped in between anger and on the other hand confusions.
